Eight Days a Week
by comedychik84
Summary: Jareth and Sarah are invaded by relatives: a week of in-laws, feasting, and awkward situations involving a hair dryer ensue. Continuation of "If I Fell", but no need to read it first
1. Prologue

AN: Hello, again! Sorry for the delay in getting a new story up…real life sort of intervened. This is just an intro to the story, sorry for the brevity. More to follow!

AN2: Definitely don't own anything except for the crazy relatives.

Ahh, the holiday season.

Is there a better time of year?

Excepting, of course, the stressful cooking and baking of huge feasts, harried present shopping and wrapping, visits from family, friends, and random neighbors, and fights with a little old lady from the assisted living facility over the last turkey in the whole town (wanna guess who won that one?); everything was just amazing!

Now, in the case of newlyweds Jareth and Sarah Kavanaugh, married just a mere five months earlier (not-so-coincidentally after Sarah's father and stepmother renewed their vows), the stress of the holidays becomes something of a diagnosable illness, at least by Goblin doctors. Not that they have degrees or anything. More often than not, they have a few pouches of bog salt and a couple chicken feet used to cure 'everything'.

Point in case, Thanksgiving 2008. The newlywed home was where the Williams-Prell family decided that the most reasonable place to have the holiday celebrated - newlyweds that no one had seen hide nor hair of since the wedding in June. Jareth, being the successful entrepreneur that he posed to be, had settled Sarah into a roomy and spacious home, fit for a King, that would certainly house all of Sarah's relatives, both her father's side and her stepmother's side, as well as his, if they decided to participate. There were enumerable bedrooms, many bathrooms, a full-time wait staff, and lovely gardens; enough to keep the family entertained and decently housed for the entire holiday week. Yes, week. Aunt Gabrielle, now the defacto matriarch of the family, had decreed that the entire week, spanning from the Wednesday preceding Thanksgiving until the Tuesday following, would be celebrated at the Kavanaugh's new residence.

There were several flaws to this plan, namely that Jareth and Sarah did not live on the Aboveworld plane. A single glance out a window may lead to heart palpitations.

That, and Aunt Gabrielle informed Sarah of this decision in a lovely, chatty letter that conveniently got lost in the mail for three weeks. Approximately two days before the relatives were to arrive.

As well as, Sarah was expecting.

Triplets.


	2. The Letter

AN: I don't own anything.

AN2: I'm thinking Monday or Wednesday for the next update…unless fate has other plans. I'll have to put in a call and let you know.

The great and magnificent Goblin King of the Labyrinth had a Post Office Box in a small innocuous town in Colorado of which he deemed to check (aka, do a bit 'o magic and have the mail delivered straight from the Aboveground box to his Underground hand) once every month or so. Customarily the mail was not important, rather sales ads and the occasional Victoria Secret catalog, so, in the four months of marriage to Sarah, the post office box was neglected necessarily. Important events had transpired in those four months, knocking the mundane checking of mail quite far down the list.

This is how the incredibly loud and overbearingly awkward argument between the couple exploded on a pleasant November afternoon. Jareth had retrieved the mail and hand delivered a letter from Sarah's Aunt Gabrielle to Sarah in the calm and peaceful solarium.

Sarah was reclined on a chaise, a glass of lemonade on the table next to her and a book resting on her stomach. She was sleeping the sleep of babes, though snoring like a New York Yankee after a bottle of Jack. Something about the position of the chaise recline, the polite members of the household proclaimed, as Sarah napped in the solarium nearly every day and the pattern was similar. She would procure a book from Jareth's library and, usually before cracking the cover, was fast asleep soon after reclining.

Jareth was loath to disturb her, but he thought she would be overjoyed to hear from her family, especially after reconnecting with them at her father and stepmother's renewal ceremony.

"Sarah, love, you've got mail." Jareth shook her shoulder, trying to gently bring her back to wakefulness.

Of course, one such as she would be resistant to gentle overtures. Jareth had to ultimately resort to bouncing on the chaise like a small child, upsetting the careful balance of the book on Sarah's stomach, and the loud crash of the book falling to the wooden floor made her eyes fly open.

"Mmm, Jareth. 'Lo." Sarah stretched her arms above her head, drawing Jareth's attention to his wife's ever-expanding stomach. He reached out to rub her belly just as she was bringing her arms down and got a smart whack in the face for his efforts.

"Oh, honey, I'm so sorry! At least you're not bleeding this time…" Sarah stopped her statement, covering her mouth with her hand to shield Jareth from the grin.

"Yes, yes. I'll warn you next time I attempt to say hello to our children. Now, to the matter at hand," Jareth rubbed his nose as he pulled the letter from his pocket. "Your Aunt Gabrielle sent a letter. I assumed you'd like to read it as soon as I had picked it up."

"Ooh, gimme gimme!" Sarah reached out with grasping hands, ignoring Jareth's raised eyebrow and snort of disbelief.

"Oh, hush, you. Someone has to get you to smile once on occasion. Do you want me to read the letter out loud, just for laughs? I do do a pretty good impression of Aunt Gabs-a-lot." Sarah tore open the letter, just barely catching Jareth's fleeting grin of amusement.

"Ahem. Dear Sarah…"

_Dear Sarah,_

_ I hope you're having a wonderful honeymoon. Well, you'd better be having a wonderful honeymoon, we haven't seen or heard from you in four months, you silly chit! Your stepmother, as you know, is awful at the gossip in this family, she never knows what to keep to herself and what to pass along the chain. Really! Do we care the Richard has increased in pant size over the past three years?! We can all see with our own eyes that he's not getting any smaller as time goes on, no need for specifics! But I digress. She hasn't said a word about you, but I know that you keep in touch with her – she said that Toby is going to visit with you over his birthday weekend in January. How is the weather in Colorado? I hope it's not too cold this time of year, you know how my arthritis acts up at the mere hint of blizzard weather. _

_ Oh dear, as much as I'd like to catch you up on all the gossip, my hand is cramping. They don't make pens the way they used to. Why, back in my day, we didn't have pens. We had pencils. We didn't even have pencil sharpeners, we had to grind down the point with our teeth. Well, you've seen my teeth, I guess some improvements have been made. But I digress. Again._

_ I hope you've talked to your stepmother lately. We've made plans to have the holiday extravaganza (you know, the usual Thanksgiving/Christmas week the family spends together) at your house, so that we can invite your father's side of the family. It will be a Prell-Williams-Kavanaugh event to remember! I'd plan on having about twenty guests for the week, I'll try to send along a list when I get the chance. But I may not get a chance to do that – did I tell you that Mrs. Crabby-pants (Kraben) asked me to bake for the church bazaar? Not "please bake a cake, or a loaf of bread, or some cookies", but BAKE for the church bazaar! I'm up to my eyeballs in snickerdoodles right now. And, later, I'll be working on the banana bread. I've won awards for that banana bread, you know. But that's neither here nor there. _

_If I don't have time to get you that list, maybe I'll arrive a little early to help you get everyone arranged in that castle you call a house. _

_ See you at 3pm on the Tuesday before Thanksgiving!_

_ Lots of love to both you and that hunky husband of yours,_

_ Aunt Gabrielle_

Sarah, ever the actress, read the entire letter without fault, barely absorbing the meaning, until she reached the final salutation. Then she stopped and reread. And read again. Then she attempted to make eye contact with her husband, perched at the end of the chaise, examining his fingernails, oblivious to the suddenly tension-filled atmosphere.

"Jareth, dear, can you hand me the envelope, please?" He picked up the shredded envelope off the floor and tossed it to his wife, then returned to his in-depth examination.

Sarah's eye began to twitch as she saw the postmark. The letter was delivered the last week in October. It was now the Sunday preceding Thanksgiving week. Meaning that twenty Aboveground guests would be arriving in two days.

"Jareth, honey, when did you retrieve the mail last?" Jareth finally noted the controlled tone in Sarah's voice and dragged his gaze away from his nails.

"Um, a week ago? Maybe more? Oh, wait, no I know it was before Halloween. Maybe it was earlier than that. I don't know, things have been rather hectic, dear. Why, something wrong?" The warning signs were all there.

Pregnant lady, sitting upright on a comfortable lounge chair. A scripted letter and a shredded envelope clasped tightly in two fists. That, and a very red faced, squinty-eyed angry wife.

Yep, DANGER, WILL ROBINSON, DANGER!

"Wait, let me read you this one line and you tell me. '_We've made plans to have the holiday extravaganza … at your house, so that we can invite your father's side of the family. It will be a Prell-Williams-Kavanaugh event to remember! I'd plan on having about twenty guests for the week'. _Well, Jareth? We have twenty members of my family arriving in two days! TWENTY! And your parents said that that would be stopping by with your brother this week, too! Ahh! What are we going to do! Why don't you check the mail more often! I could have told them that now is a bad time! They don't even know we're pregnant! We don't even live in the same world! They think we live in Colorado, for heaven's sake! Jareth, say something!!" Sarah became agitated, her voice rising to a rather alarming decibel, vibrating the panes of glass in the solarium. She moved to stand but was prevented by a strong arm holding her in place, forcing her to recline as Jareth gently pressed her back.

"You haven't told your family we're pregnant! What were you waiting for, the children to start quoting Hamlet!" Jareth loomed over her, his mouth hard and angry, but his eyes bespoke the truth of his insecurity.

"Of course I haven't told them, yet!" Sarah took a deep calming breath and reclined again, forcing herself to relax.

"I wanted to keep this between us for a little longer. You know that as soon as we involve the families it will be the 'family project'. I kind of like having a secret with you, something only we know. Your parents and brother would find out this week anyway, then we'd tell my family over Christmas." She reached up and stroked his cheek. The tension quickly drained and the two looked at each other, angry words quickly forgotten.

"All right. Just so you understand that it would be rather impossible to hide our wonderful and special babies from the world forever. They will have rules and duties when they get older, so much will be expected of them. But, for now, they're ours. Just yours and mine, to love and cherish." While very much the manly man, willing to fix anything (or order someone to do it) or kill a spider, he did have his romantic side, knowing just what to whisper to his wife.

Jareth rubbed Sarah's belly, physically connecting with their unborn children, as he looked deeply into Sarah's eyes. They shared a brief kiss, a mere touching of their lips before they parted, only to gaze into each other's eyes.

"What are we going to do?" Sarah whispers, trusting her husband to figure things out as she dragged him down for a deeper kiss. As King, he should be good at multi-tasking.


	3. Procrastination: The Name of the Game

AN: As per always I own nothing, just take creative license.

AN2: So sorry for the delay, fate did have some pushback to my previous request.

Fatherhood, as it were, had somewhat changed Jareth. He was much more genial towards his wife, having an almost perturbing affinity for affection and random bursts of song (not that that was much of a change).

He was forever asking after her health, watching her eat meals and consume beverages like a hawk, and often popping in from his various kingly duties to gently rub Sarah's belly and give her a cookie.

Of course, it was a bran cookie with extra fiber and chia seeds for protein, but it's the thought that counts, right?

Jareth was, however, a man. A man who had had innumerable years of establishing habits and patterns of behavior before he married his petite and almost-but-not-quite-rotund wife.

In all reality, he was a procrastinator. A horrible, very adept, procrastinator. Add to that he was very good at assuaging his wife's fears and worries, regardless of their magnitude, with honeyed words and songs. Oh, the songs.

Sarah had been lulled into a false belief that Jareth was diligently working on creating a portal from an Aboveground house in Colorado to their home in the Underground for her family to traverse for Thanksgiving. He was also working on crafting a brief winter spell over the Labyrinth gardens so that the visiting family would still think they were in Colorado. His family, of course, had been contacted and made aware of the potentially awkward situation with Sarah's family and were planning to visit next season.

She'd been busy making sure that the laundry goblins knew to wash their feet before they jumped into the boiling laundry cauldrons to clean linens, as well as making sure that the Cleaners had cleaned and sanitized all of the sewage pipes so that there would be no off-putting smells. Then she'd gone to each of the guest rooms and added personal touches to their suites. And made sure that the bathrooms had normal sized toilets.

Jareth had thought it'd be humorous to put mini toilets in each of the bathrooms that magically resize to the person as they made use. Not so funny in the middle of the night. With the light off.

So when Sarah bustled (waddled) into the throne room on Tuesday morning she expected it to be goblin- and chicken-free and somehow resembling a aboveground living room. Instead, there was a small child, costume-suited child (Superman? When time was reversed?) flying through the air, drunken goblins bouncing from the walls and diving into the pit, and chickens defecating on every available square inch of the floor. Jareth was facing away from the door, but she could clearly hear his voice as he commanded laughter and attention.

She took a slow, deep breath and put a hand to her bump.

"Oh, Jareth, honey?" Sarah barely projected.

"Sarah! I thought you were taking your morning rest! Your family is coming soon, you know, and you want to be fresh as a daisy for their visit. When are they supposed to be here again? Tomorrow, right?" Jareth deftly caught the child, handed the chortling baby to a tall goblin, and made his way to his wife.

The volume level in room increased, as the baby vomited on its nursemaid and the goblins began to fling the baby's goo at each other.

Sarah closed her eyes and clicked her heels together three times. And opened her eyes.

"Damn, that never works." She muttered, glaring at her subjects and their drunken and disorderly behavior. "Jareth." Sarah called his attention back to herself, as he was closely watching as the baby was escorted from the room and had its mouth wiped.

"Yes, dear?"

"My family is coming in less than twelve hours. Aunt Gabrielle might show up at any time. Why is nothing ready? What's going to happen when they get here?" She crossed her arms and would have tapped her foot, but that would have thrown her off balance.

"Oh. I'll be right back, sweetheart." Jareth dropped a crystal and disappeared in a pouf (not puff, because puffs are far too feminine for the Goblin King) of hypoallergenic autumn colored glitter.

He could be very seasonal when he wanted.

The goblins stopped in mid-yell at the disappearance of the King. They suddenly noticed a pissed and pregnant Goblin Queen. Who had such a notorious I'm-gonna-skin-your-chickens-for-supper glare that she rarely had to use her small store of magic.

"Clean. This. Place. Up. NOW!" Sarah let loose with a rather unladylike and, yet, expected shout.

Much like the timed 'clean up drills' found often on Barney the Purple Dinosaur, the goblins sang an off-key version of "Clean Up, Clean Up, Everybody, Everywhere…" as they moved faster than the human eye to tidy the throne room. Within moments, the throne room looked presentable and the goblins melted away into the recesses of the Goblin Castle to leave Sarah standing alone, still by the entry way, and still rubbing her belly.

"Well, it couldn't hurt." Sarah muttered. She closed her eyes. And clicked her heels three times.

"Sarah, my sweet, open your eyes." Jareth whispered in her ear as he wrapped his arms around her from behind.

"Will I get mad if I do?" Sarah whispered back, not opening her eyes yet.

"No. I hope you like it." He touched his mouth to the side of her neck, humming softly a familiar tune.

Instead of opening her eyes, Sarah turned in his arms, putting her arms around his neck, rubbing her face against his soft shirt and inhaling his spicy wild scent.

"You know we won't get a moment of peace and quiet until after the family leave, right? Even though the goblins are here all of the time, we can always send them home. You will be nice to my aunts, right? I think all five of them are coming, and you know how they get." Sarah spoke in a low, intimate tone, grateful that she could still be held by her husband, disregarding her burgeoning belly.

"I've asked Cook to make the finest spiced eggnog so they will be properly intoxicated for the week. Cook has agreed to prepare the meals and the traditional fruitcake for the entire family, so we won't have to engage a caterer. And I've put a lockdown on the city so that everyone stays out of the castle for the week. All for you, honey." Jareth gently tugged on her ponytail, then smoothing his hands down her soft sweater-covered back to hug her closer.

"Well, good. Wait, spiced eggnog? Traditional fruitcake? Honey, that's not our Thanksgiving traditions, that's Christmas." Sarah pulled away to look up at her husband.

The expression on his face was explanation enough.

"Oh, Jareth." Sarah turned to look at the magically redecorated throne room-turned family room. There was a cozy fire in the new fireplace and instead of the pit there was an amazing oriental rug and matching couches, angled facing the fireplace. The stone walls were replaced with toasted marshmallow-colored walls and floor-length drapes covered the windows; snow and frost could be seen, though just moments before it was a mild early-fall like day outside. Now it was more blizzard-like.

And in the corner sat a large and tastefully decorated Christmas tree. With presents beneath.


	4. Let it snow

AN: So sorry for the delay, my nephew was up for the weekend so…it was pretty much "Dominick weekend", if you know what I mean. We almost went to Chuckie Cheese. Yikes.

AN2: I really don't own anything, except for peripheral characters and, I suppose, the theme.

"It's all right, you can change it back with magic, right?" Sarah said, not nearly as worried as she had been before when she thought nothing had been pre-arranged for the week.

Jareth casually tossed a crystal and grinned down at his wife. "Of course. You and your holidays. I can never get them straight!"

Sarah smiled back and turned to gaze at her new utterly human living room.

The window, however, was still covered with snow and frost. And it seemed to be increasing by the moment.

"Um, Jareth? The weather?" Sarah nodded at the window.

"You ask so much of me. Why can't we just have a snow holiday? It will keep everyone inside. It's snowing in the real Colorado, isn't it?" Jareth stretches his neck first to the right, then to the left, releasing tension.

"Yes…but not ten feet. How will we explain that it's only two feet in the Aboveground, but when they get into our house, it's ten outside?" Sarah pointed out logically.

"Son of a Goblin's Uncle. Really, Sarah? What is it with you and this 'logic' excrement?" Jareth huffed and the irritation began to show in his face.

"Aw, Jareth, you're so cute." Sarah laughed a little as she reached up to pat his cheek. "It's crap, not excrement. You'll have to at least match the Aboveground weather. Though I'm sure the aunts will be soused, even they might notice."

Jareth let out a heavy sigh. He began to straighten his collar and gave a fluff to his hair. "I have to go renegotiate. Which of the triplets are we willing to give to Boreas to change the direction of the north wind, again? I'll be back by lunch, dear. Don't work too hard." The last bit was imparted with heavy sarcasm and he vanished before Sarah could swat him.

Sarah inspected the room a little closer, just to make sure that all remnants of Christmas were gone. She noticed a single present on the floor, wrapped prettily with silver paper and blue ribbon.

"Aw, he can be so sweet sometimes." Sarah said softly to herself as she walked across the room, then stooped awkwardly to get the present.

"Oof, I'm getting too big for this!" Sarah mumbled to herself as she sat on one of the new sofas, the fireplace warming her side.

Sarah quickly looked left and then right, making sure that there were no random goblins spying on her. After being assured that she was alone…she tore into the packaging like there would never be another present as long as she would live until the end of the world. Bits of paper flew into the air, the ribbon managed to catch on fire in the fireplace, going up in a noxious poof of smoke that went unnoticed by the small child hidden in the grown up's body.

"Oooh, another present." Nestled inside the larger box was a smaller one, this one wrapped in gold paper with a pretty red ribbon. She tore into this smaller one no less carefully and opened the cardboard lid with no hesitation.

Nestled inside the tissue was a perfect, ripe peach, much like the peach Jareth had given Sarah during her trek through the Labyrinth. Next to the peach was a little folded note, presumably from Jareth.

"My dearest wife,

I liked you better when you were drugged. Eat this and call me in the morning.

-J

"That no-good, petulant-child, big-haired, jerk!" Sarah stood up quickly (well, as quickly as a woman in her second trimester carrying triplets could) and threw the peach into the fire.

Several hours later, roundabout noontime, Sarah made her way to the kitchen with the intention to check on dinner preparations. Attached to the waistband of her maternity jeans was the Kavanaugh's 'house phone'...or the only phone to her knowledge that could receive and send calls between the Underground and Aboveground. Just in case one of her family members called, she could be ready at a moment's notice.

"Cook? How are things coming? Uh, cook? Is that you?" Apparently Jareth's glamour had spread to the staff; the five kitchen workers were smocked and appropriately dressed…and about four feet taller than usual.

Their facial features weren't too terribly different, but (shallow Sarah thought), who would really be looking closely at the hired help? Would it be unheard of to have hired a family of reformed cannibals from the Arizona desert?

Ok, ok, they didn't look that bad. They were just…different. Their skin was a bit yellow, their eyes a bit far apart, and, most noticeable of all, their noses looked like putty squished by a child and plopped onto their faces. But not too abnormal. Really.

"Yes, yes. All is fine. I have instructions. You want food now? Good, you sit. Here." Cook had something of a stream of consciousness moment where she carried on a completely one-sided conversation that ended in putting a plate of stew, a spork, and a glass of milk in front of a then-seated Sarah.

"All right, then. How do you like the new glamour?" Sarah asked as she reached for the spork with her left hand and the glass of milk with her right. She was attempting to get better at multi-tasking before the triplets came along.

"I look ugly. Too tall, the ground too far away. King say that we be normal when we go home for day." Sarah was used to fractured conversation with the goblin help and was unfazed by the mismatched conjugations.

"Ah. This stew is good! Did you add something new?"

"King say to use more chia seeds. Says they good for you."

"Lord, Jareth." Sarah rolled her eyes, but kept eating, the stew disappearing rather quickly.

"Did you get extra help for this week, Cook? I'm afraid that my family may be too demanding for you…" Sarah drained the rest of her milk, taking a quick look at Cook over the rim. Cook was kneading honey colored bread, presumably for dinner rolls. She added a handful of seeds (of course chia seeds) and kneaded the dough a little more before pulling out the rolling pin.

"Yes. King hired more goblins from village. They be here tomorrow to clean. King pay them extra beer and they happy."

"Ah, yes, beer. Um, could you make sure that my aunts don't have too much of the beer? The watered down wine is fine, but the beer might be too much for them." Sarah pulled herself up from the stool she had eaten at and made her way to the sinks with her plate and glass.

"Ack! Put that down, Lady! You no carry anything." Before Sarah could raise a half-hearted protest, the 'home phone' began to ring and Cook snatched the dinnerware out of her hands.

As she attempted to unclasp the phone from her waist, Jareth popped into the room. He unclipped the phone and pressed the talk button before Sarah could even snap her fingers to retrieve the phone.

"Kavanaugh residence!" Jareth said merrily into the phone.

"Why, hello Aunt Gaby! Er, Gabrielle!" Jareth turned his back on Sarah, striding out of the kitchens.

Sarah, of course, followed him into the new living room, after waving good-bye to the cook staff.

"Well, that's no good. We'll be there to get you in the SUV shortly. Just sit tight. Oh, the other aunts are with you? Fine, we'll make sure we have room. See you soon. Stay put." Jareth clicked the phone off before Sarah could snatch it from his hands.

"Jareth! You were supposed to let me answer the phone today!" Sarah pouted, crossing her arms over her stomach.

"Don't be whiny, honey, it does nothing for your complexion." Jareth said as he clipped the phone to his now-normal belt. Sarah noticed the rest of his attire as she glared at him – clean but worn jeans, a navy blue Colorado sweatshirt, and running shoes that Sarah would swore she'd never seen before.

"Oh, hush up, you big jerk. I'm allowed to be whiny, my ankles are swollen and I have to eat with a spork because Cook won't let me eat with a fork after the last time. My hand eye coordination is just not what it used to be. Another reason for me to be whiny!" Sarah tried to give reasonable explanations for her irrational behavior, knowing that she was just being a shrew because she could. It would have been more satisfying if her husband would respond to her snide comments, but he was, after all, the Goblin King. The King of sarcasm and royal jerk-ness.

"Yes, yes. Are you coming with me, or staying here to meet your relatives?" Jareth pulled on a black down-filled parka that he pulled out of nowhere and snapped his fingers for a pink Sarah-sized parka. He opened the jacket appealingly to Sarah.

"Coming with you to where? I thought they were going to get a taxi from the airport?" Sarah shrugged into the garment as she sought more information.

"Well, there's been a slight problem with the weather. Cars without four wheel drive may not make it from the airport to our house Aboveground." He pulled out a pair of leather driving gloves and made short work of pulling them on.

"But I thought it was only supposed to snow a few more inches today? That can't be too terribly bad." He snapped again and a cute white knit cap appeared in his hand. He pulled it on over Sarah's brown locks as she suspiciously looked up at him.

"Well, the negotiations with Boreas went well. He did agree to even out the weather between here and there. Unfortunately…are you ready honey? I'll just pop us up to the garage. I had a goblin start the car, it should be warm by now." At her brief nod, they were transported to the garage Aboveground, into the large black Escalade with huge snow tires and spacious seating.

"Unfortunately, what, Jareth!?" Sarah asked exasperatedly as she buckled her seat belt.

"Unfortunately he decided to be a smart ass and dumped two feet of snow up here now, and after we get your family, he'll dump another three feet. You know, to even out the weather. It was either that or he really did want one of our triplets. I compromised."

"Oh, Jareth. This is going to be interesting…" Sarah glanced back as the garage door began to slowly lift and snow blew into the garage.

"I'm just going to close my eyes until we get there. Make sure you stay on the road, honey." Sarah reclined her chair slightly and relaxed against the soft leather, absolutely confident that her husband would get to the airport without a problem. After all, he could make cars fly, right?


	5. Airports and Blizzards

AN: Sorry for the delay! Hopefully now that the family is all 'in' the story will flow faster.

Disclaimer: I don't own anything, of course, besides the peripheral characters.

The roads were barely plowed and the snow was coming down heavily, the wiper blades ineffective in their quest of clear vision. Jareth, although in control of a superior level of magic and control, was gripping the steering wheel, white-knuckled and teeth-gritted. Sarah was sacked out in the front passenger seat, oblivious. Luckily, they were mere minutes from the airport, having taken some 'shortcuts' along the way.

"Sarah? Hon, we're almost there." Jareth called to his wife, unable to shake or poke her as he was occupied with staying on the road.

"Mmm hmm. I'm awake." Sarah pulled herself upright, pushing at the tendrils of hair that had fallen into her face. She took a deep breath and stretched her arms above her head.

"Did you bring the phone with you? Just in case they've tried to call?" Sarah asked, still somewhat sleepy, turning her head toward Jareth.

"I didn't."

Sarah finally noticed that her husband was gripping the wheel and the white out surrounding the car. "Oh, dear. Good thing we can drive out there to get the family, otherwise, what would they do?!"

"Yep."

They sat in silence, Sarah groggily staring out the window and Jareth fully concentrating on driving. They pulled through to the passenger pick-up, gliding to a stop in front of the second gate.

"You stay here; don't open the doors until I get back. I'll find the aunts and any straggling family members and bring them here." Jareth released his seatbelt, leaned over to peck Sarah on her lips good-bye and exited the car.

"Heh, I'm not going to complain. Go for it, I'll just stay in the nice warm car." Sarah muttered to herself as she tracked Jareth's progress across the icy pavement.

Within ten minutes, Jareth had found his entourage with little to no furor. The five aunts (Gabrielle, Sally, Margaret, Agnes and Hilde) had been waiting patiently by the sliding doors, Sarah's parents and younger brother were trotting down the thoroughfare, and Cousin Mark (Margaret's son), his wife Mari, and their eight-year old twins, Bill and Jill, timely emerged from the bathrooms.

Yes, that's eleven people. To fit in a single SUV. And the luggage for these eleven people.

"Oh, Jareth, dearie, can you get our bags?" Aunt Aggie pointed to a small mountain of neon colored luggage pieces.

"No. Get your own." Jareth crossed his arms and looked down at the frail lady. He just realized the people/luggage situation and really just wanted to pouf himself back home and leave Sarah's family here. But then he'd never hear the end of it.

"Sir, sorry for the delay! Here, let me get those." The sliding doors opened swiftly, admitting a short little man with a big nose, who began running toward the party.

He piled the luggage into his small arms and, 'magically', had all the pieces stacked in no time. "Now, if half of yous will follow me, we can be on our way."

Jareth still stood with his arms crossed, stunned by Hoggle's appearance and lack of glamour. Apparently, clothes really did make the man, he thought, as he noticed the dapper black suit and chauffer cap Hoggle wore. The oversized jeweled necklace, however, was a little much.

Cousin Mark and his family followed Hoggle, as did Sarah's parents, leaving Toby and the aunts to ride with Jareth and Sarah. The luggage had disappeared with Hoggle through the sliding doors, leaving Jareth with the aunts and Toby staring at him.

"Well? Move!" Jareth, still crabby, reverted to his imperious tone he uses when dictating to the castle goblins. He strode towards the door, trusting that the family would follow behind him. He was, after all, a bit curious as to how Hoggle arrived and exactly why he arrived when he did.

Two black SUVs sat at the curb, a short Hoggle sat in the driver's seat of one, obviously sitting on a phone book of some sort. Sarah was smiling and waving from the passenger seat of the other vehicle, obviously eager to see her family.

"Here we are, ladies. And Toby. Let me get the door for you." Jareth, ever the quick-tempered, graciously opened the door and handed the aunts in, one by one. Surprisingly, the bench seat that sat three comfortably now sat five with space to spare. Seems that he may not have needed another car, after all. But if it had been anyone else in this vehicle, they may have been overly curious. As it was, the aunts barely noticed and Toby should have known the deal.

Should have. Maybe it was time to have a conversation with Toby. Jareth ran around the car, buckled in and was on the road before Sarah barely had a chance to turn around.

"Hi Aunt Gabrielle, Aunt Margie, Aunt Sally, Aunt Aggie and Aunt Hilde! How were your flights? Hey, Tobes, excited for some feasting?" The conversation in the car became loud and animated, Jareth began to regret allowing Sarah's family over for Thanksgiving. Of course, they were given little to no choice, but he could have done something. Anything.

Ten minutes later, they were travelling along the road at a good clip (surprising, in the blizzard type conditions) when the saw a car in a ditch on the side of the road, its headlights facing the wrong direction, and it was obvious that the accident had just happened.

Jareth was perfectly content to keep driving, calling the Aboveground authorities to help the stranded travelers.

Sarah, however, was not. "We have to stop, Jareth. They could be in trouble! They're still in their car!"

"You ask so much of me. As usual." For all of his complaining, Jareth still pulled to the shoulder and let lose his seatbelt.

"Toby, I need your assistance. Are you wearing boots?" Jareth looked over his shoulder at his brother-in-law, who had a deer caught in the headlights look to him.

"No." How could a ten-year-old really help, anyway? Albeit a bright and clever ten-year-old, but he had yet to grow into…anything…yet.

"No matter. Wait until I come around. Ladies, would you mind rearranging to the backseat, just in case we have to take on more passengers?" They nodded and began to move their bits and pieces around as Jareth hopped out of the car, avoiding his wife's gaze. He tended to hold grudges. Even against pregnant ladies.

During the brief conversation and reorganization of the car, the passenger door of the stranded vehicle had begun to be pushed open. Jareth hurried around the car, pulled Toby's door open, and lifted the boy down. Magically the tennis shoes on his feet were replaced by heavy winter boots and his reasonably warm jacket was now a subzero jacket. Hmm, magically.

The door was closed before any comments could be overheard by the aunts, and Toby followed Jareth through the high snow.

"Toby, we need to talk. I figure this short little walk will be enough time. Your sister and I do not live in Colorado, we live Underground. The goblins will not play games with you while the family is there, and you will not say a word to anyone. Understand?" Jareth tossed the words over his shoulder, knowing full well that Toby's response would not be heard over the whistling wind.

The passengers, two tall men, as it would stand, of the stranded vehicle had pulled themselves out by now and were starting to trek through the snow towards the tall imposing man and the bundled child.

"Excuse us! Can we get a ride!" One of the men shouted into the wind, his voice carrying to Jareth.

"Of course, of course, do you need anything from your car? Perhaps you should turn off the headlights?" Jareth suggested as Toby rounded the corner to stand next to him.

"Toby Williams! What are you doing out here? And with _this_ man…oh. Oh! Jareth! It's Charlie and Bobby! We were on our way to your house, anyway, when the car got stuck. We didn't realize how bad the snow would be." The other man, presumably Bobby, trudged back to the car, turned off the headlights and grabbed two bags from the backseat.

"Great. Let's go." Jareth turned, pulling Toby in front of him, retracing their steps through the ever-increasing snow.

Ten minutes later, Jareth sat in stony silence as the family's conversation ebbed and flowed around him. Sarah was glowing with happiness – the only reason that he hadn't banished them all to the bog.

"Jareth, are you all right? You're being very quiet." Sarah whispered, the conversation continuing without her.

"I don't like this. Are we really keeping them for seven days? A whole week? They're loud and obnoxious, worse than goblins." Sarah smiled and patted his knee.

"You'll survive. Just wait, they haven't seen me stand up yet, it's going to get worse." Sarah subtly rubbed her belly, making brief eye contact with Jareth. He smiled a little, his bad mood banished for now.


	6. The Arrival of the Horde

AN: Yikes. It's been a really long time since I've started this (yes, Chap 1 says Thanksgiving 2008). I've written a few chapters in advance and hope that will keep me motivated to post in a timely fashion…

A2: I did reload previous chapters (in re-reading, there was some inconsistency). Nothing too big, if you don't want to read, no worries, you'll make it through.

"We're here! Everyone out!" Jareth pulled into the double garage, next to the other SUV – already empty of people. He assumed that the family had gone inside with no problem. He quickly clicked the garage door remote to try and keep out the blizzard snow.

The backseats emptied quickly, everyone filing hurriedly in the house to escape the cold. Jareth and Toby slowly removed themselves from the car, Sarah waiting for a hand down from her husband.

"Toby, do you want to hear a secret?" At the boy's eager nod, Jareth opened Sarah's door and helped her down.

"Surprise! Sarah's pregnant!" Jareth did big show hands, emphasizing Sarah's belly. Toby's eyebrows raised in question.

"She just looks fat to me." Sarah choked on a laugh, pushing her brother's shoulder affectionately.

"It's the coat, isn't it? Pink was just never meant to be used on coats this size, I suppose. I really am preggers, kiddo – you'll have a couple nieces and nephews in a few months, probably March or so." Sarah gently moved him to precede her through the door, Jareth bringing up the rear.

"Your garage smells funny. Well, really, your doorway smells funny – like that nasty wheat germ mom makes me eat with my peanut butter." Toby stepped through the door, avoiding the topic of pregnancy with all the grace of a Williams lawyer. He'd had plenty of practice.

Before Sarah and Jareth could follow him, the garage door began to rise. A set of high lights cut through the night, Jareth carefully stepping in front of Sarah, neither of them expecting to see another car. Regardless of the driver, there was nowhere for the car to go – it was a two car garage. That currently was all full up.

"Jareth, poof a car!" Sarah hissed, realizing that the car driving in from the snow wasn't going to take no for an answer. Within seconds, there was an empty spot and shimmering air currents as a black SUV clone pulled in.

The moments of tension passed incrementally, as Jareth and Sarah waited for the passengers to emerge.

As the driver's door began to slowly open Sarah whispered to her husband, "Jareth, I've really got to use the ladies. Uh, can you handle this? I'll meet you inside."

He felt a murmur of magic and sensed that his wife had adjourned to the porcelain throne, just as Hoggle popped down from the driver's seat.

"Sorry, yer Mage-er, uh, yeah, I went back to get the rest of 'em. Cook said they called – this is everyone. I's get their luggage in a minute." Hoggle hurried past Jareth into the house, presumably to water the flowers. He was a nervous creature around the King.

"Welcome, everyone! For those that I don't know, I'm Jareth, Sarah's husband. Please do come in and make yourselves at home." Jareth put on the 'good host' façade as people began to disembark from the vehicle, all the while singing silently to himself, 'Only one week, only one week, and then I get to swim in the creek'.

"Oh, my, you're certainly a handsome one! I'm Harriet, Karen's mother, and this is Samuel, my husband. The Aunts are his sisters – quite a handful! Why, I remember the time that we were at a family gathering and there was a rather large punch bowl, if you get what I mean..." Harriet trailed off as her husband gently moved her toward the door, nodding sharply at Jareth.

A throat was cleared, drawing Jareth's attention back to the 'receiving line' of sorts. "How ya doin' son? I'm Jake and this here is Sophie, we're Sarah's grandparents on her daddy's side. Sure nice of you to put us up for a few days – that Prell family always did know when to overstep their boundaries!" Jake, a sturdy linebacker sort of man, possessed none of the quiet authority of his son, was rather loud and abrasive as he attempted to slap Jareth on the back in passing. Jareth side stepped him so that he was awkwardly patting air. Jake was still shaking his head as he all but shoved his wife before him in the door.

"Hi, I'm Karen's brother Larry, this is my wife Julia and our daughter Emmaline. You know our son Charlie and his partner Bobby – I hope they made it all right!" A rather forgettable man shook Jareth's hand as his wife smiled her greeting.

"They're inside, I believe." Jareth answered, all the while singing in his head, "I've got a lovely bunch of coconuts..."

Emmaline dragged a similarly aged teenage from behind her. "You can call me Emma, Jareth, and this is my friend Rachel. She didn't have anywhere to go for the holidays and I figured that Sarah would be ok with her crashing." The words flew from the teen's mouth, her uncertainty evident. Rachel smiled, but didn't quite make eye contact.

"Sure, the more the merrier." Jareth bared his teeth in a resemblance of a smile.

The teens disappeared inside, leaving Jareth staring at the still-open garage door.

Twenty-two relatives. One week.


	7. Names, Toilets, and Biscuits, Oh my!

AN: Lookit! I've actually kept a timetable! This bodes well for the continuation of this story.

**Back tracking a few minutes**

Sarah had a bit of a dilemma. She had quite an impressive stomach at this stage in the game and also had quite a problem of seeing down and around said girth. Erm, well, not girth. Perhaps, children nestled in goo? Well, whichever. She most certainly could not determine what color toenail polish Gerda had subjected her to.

This lead to the current dilemma. When she gracefully bowed out of the garage greeting line, she poofed herself to the Master bathroom, only to find that the toilet...well, the toilet was not so big. And, as inanimate objects imbued with magic are predestined to have, the toilet had jokes.

The child deciding to cannonball on her bladder decided her fate in short order.

As Sarah was quite the dainty princess (well, queen) she had no time to play these powder room games and, instead of giving in to the randomly (and awkwardly) sizing/re-sizing toilet, she poofed herself to the first bathroom that came to mind.

Unfortunately, it was not a local bathroom. No, no, it wasn't down the hall, in another wing of the Castle or, heck, even in the Underground.

She ended up in a Lowes home improvement store toilet, which, at least, was clean and smelled fresh (oddly?).

"Well, at least I can get batteries for the Xbox. Toby will continue to be entertained." Sarah muttered as she entered a stall.

Jareth walked slowly toward the main receiving - er - living room, examining each knick-knack and portrait as if he had never seen them before, trying to wait out Sarah in hopes she would beat him to the living room.

No such luck. In due time, he arrived at the living room, now full of people, a few of them loud and boisterous, the others sitting in small cliques, most likely their immediate family groups.

Jareth sighed.

"Hello everyone! I hope you found your rooms to your liking. We'll have a light dinner in about thirty minutes in the dining room. Until then, Marja has placed a biscuit tray and coffee on the sideboard." Jareth gestured to the sideboard, noting that the children, Toby, the twins, Emma, and Rachel, were curiously absent.

Robert must have noticed Jareth's seeking gaze because he sidled over. "They went to find something to do. I think your driver escorted them to the game room or some such. I didn't quite catch it; he is rather a mumbler isn't he? Where's my daughter, by the way? We've come all this way to see her and have yet to have a conversation."

Robert was an excellent conversationalist – if the other person in the conversation was mute.

"She'll be along. Let me go check on her." Even though Jareth had eons on Robert, the man still imbued him with a son-in-law like tension. Thankfully, the excuse to find Sarah was a plausible one - it was unlikely that she was still tending to business, so she had to be doing something non-family related.

And if Jareth had to be there, so did Sarah. That's the way marriage worked (or, at least, that's what Dr. Phil said).

Jareth slipped into the hall and summoned Hoggle, the little man still in his pressed clothes and garish jewelry.

"Hoggle, where is my wife? And the children? Tell me you didn't let them into the Escher room." Jareth began to stride down the hallway toward the royal family wing, hands behind his back, expecting Hoggle to keep pace.

"I don't knows about Sarah, but them kids are in tha second receiving room." Hoggle puffed as his little legs stretched farther than previously thought possible in order to keep pace with his King.

"What's in the second receiving room that would entertain those kids?" Jareth stopped short, noticing Hoggle's struggle. Though, if asked, he stopped because he needed to examine the placement of a bust of some such relative.

"There's computers an a picture box an something called an x box. Sarah did it." Hoggle quickly blamed Sarah, in case of penal repercussions, but Jareth just smiled and shook his head.

"That will be all, Hoggle." Jareth veered his course toward the second receiving room, Hoggle fleeing in the opposite direction, toward the kitchens.

"Come on, come on! Follow me! Man, you guys are such n00bs! You're going to get us all merc ed*!" Toby was sitting on the floor, his shoes tossed haphazardly in a pile and had his tongue stuck out in concentration. Bill sat next to him, clutching his controller as if it had a mind of its own and hardly touching the buttons.

"Toby, stop yelling, you're going to get us booted off this game!" Jill shouted from across the room, as she and Rachel were playing on a different television set. Both girls were leaned in close to the screen and were capably toggling the controllers.

Of the four players, Toby alone had a headset on and was shouting into the attached microphone as preteens are wont to do when playing an Xbox LIVE game.

Emma sat by the window, reading what looked to be a Twilight book, and had some sort of headphone set in, wholly ignoring the room.

Jareth made sure they weren't going to kill each other (aka, put a slight magical element into the air to calm them. It's not drugging if it's done with magic. Aboveground parents do it all the time! It's called Ritalin.) and left the room to return to the stodgy adults.

The first receiving room was much the way that he had left it, boring and muted. Well, almost.

The aunts had apparently brought their own brew, as they passed around what looked to be a flask (an elephant sized flask) and poured a bit into each of their cups.

At Jareth's raised brow, Aunt Aggie said, "We're on vacation! We're entitled! We're old! Want some?"

"No thanks, I'll pass..." Jareth trailed off as he noted the attention of the aunts had shifted from him to somewhere behind his left shoulder. Knowing that it was Sarah by the delicate feminine scent and her, now unmistakable, gait, Jareth quickly scanned the room for first reactions.

Aunt Gabrielle was the first to recover. She crowed. "It's time to start a new name board!

*sorry, there is no proper way to spell the Halo slang word "merc-ed". It means killed in a mercenary sort of way. Hope that helps.


	8. Let's get down to business

"A what?" Jareth muttered as he clasped his wife's hand and tugged her to stand next to him.

"Oh, no." Sarah groaned, squeezing Jareth's hand to keep him quiet.

"Yes, yes, yes!" Aunt Aggie began clapping, accidentally knocking her glass unnoticed on the carpet.

"We'll have to make a trip to the craft store, though. I didn't bring any supplies. Sarah! How could you keep this from us! We would have prepared better. Come on, girls, we'd best bundle up." Aunt Harry had stood up and was tottering toward the door, her voice rising as she neared the door where Sarah and Jareth were standing. The other relatives all began to stand and make their way towards the door.

"Nonsense, Aunt Harry, we have a fully stocked supply room. Hoggle can take you there, you won't have to put your outside things on." Sarah caught one of Aunt Harry's flailing arms and patted it reassuringly.

The aunts leveraged themselves from their respective couches and made a beeline for Sarah, all speaking at once. "Congrats sweetie!" "Look at you, you're as round as a tub!" "When are you due? Next month?"

After the last question, the room grew hushed. After all, for all appearances the family was liberal and accepting (note, Charlie and Bobby), when it came to babies, they were very cognizant of timelines. If Jareth and Sarah had gotten married in July...and it was now November...

"Well, you should know, we're expecting triplets. And they're not due until March." Sarah blurted, correctly interpreting the family's silence. And, just like that, the volume was switched back on.

"That's fantastic! Three new Kavanaughs!" "Now darling, do you know their sex yet?" The women of the room continued to call out questions as Robert and Karen edged their way to the stand before Jareth and Sarah.

"My little girl is having babies of her own now!" Robert looked rather overwhelmed, in a manly way of course, as he gazed down at his daughter.

Karen had no such restraint. She threw her arms around Sarah and whispered in her ear, "Congratulations, you'll make a great mom." Sarah hugged her stepmother back, tears springing to her eyes.

"And...scene!" Bobby called from the background, Karen and Sarah breaking apart laughing.

Jareth had been shaking hands and nodding at appropriate moments, all while keeping an eye on his wife. She looked a little wan and tired, certainly food would remedy that.

"Time for dinner, everyone, let's adjourn to the dining room. Sarah, let's go get the young ones." Jareth announced and the crowd filtered through the double door entrance.

"You all right, honey?" Jareth asked in a low voice.

"I'll survive. I'm starving, though – I hope we've got something good for dinner." They stopped in front of the newly appointed playroom and Jareth stuck his head in.

"All right, let's go – time for dinner. Wash your hands, get in gear!" Much like bossing around goblins, Jareth excelled at motivating a room into action. Xbox controllers were forgotten, book forgotten on the window seat. Toby and the twins were out the door instantaneously, Rachel and Emma left at a more sedate pace, too cool to hurry to a meal at seventeen.

Once the room was empty, Jareth grabbed his wife around the waist and leaned in close for a kiss.

Sarah sighed, a small smile on her face as her husband released her, only to take her hand and pouf them to the hallway outside the dining room.

"Be sure to eat some chia seeds, honey. And some flax. It's good for you and the babies." Jareth preened in a small mirror hanging on the wall, Sarah recovering from a small bout of motion sickness/nausea.

"I don't want any chia seeds. They taste like socks. Goblin socks. I want pancakes. Pancakes with honey. Oo, and a hot dog with lots of mustard and relish." Sarah headed toward the door, pausing before the door to collect herself before facing the family.

"No hotdogs. They're made with who knows what. I've read Kipling, I'm sure he's not lying or exaggerating, even if he had written _the Jungle_ fifty years ago."

"Jareth, that was Sinclair. And it was more like a hundred years ago." Sarah huffed at him and disappeared into the cacophony of familial din.

AN: Sorry for the delay! I promise this fic will pick up shortly, I wanted to establish a baseline (and the next chapter is much, much longer…promise)

AN2: Sorry, again, I couldn't resist a hotdog joke. And an American novelist toss in (used to be an English major in another life).


	9. Food Fight…and Naming finally?

"Oh, Sarah, dear, Hoggle showed us the lovely craft room you have here! We will make a wonderful name board, perhaps even have some sort of naming game!" Aunt Gabrielle piped up as Sarah slipped into her seat to the left of the head of the table.

There was no food on the tables, as of yet, though the beverage glasses were filled and pitchers of sweet tea were sitting at intervals. If Sarah lived in a Japanese anime, surely her eyes would have been weeping as an external expression of hunger and frustration. Crackers only lasted so long for pregnant women.

The children had come in, adding their din to room, and the long table was filled to capacity. No one happened to notice the snow and frost covered windows.

"That's great, Aunt Gaby! That'll be something to work on tomorrow, before we have Thanksgiving dinner. I'm thinking we'll eat around two, or so, and then we'll have plenty of time for naming after that." Sarah smiled, albeit wearily, at her aunt, noting that her other four aunts were just as interested. The five aunts had managed to cluster next to each other, near the center of the table. Across from Sarah sat Toby, a self-satisfied smug look on his face (of course, he knew why he sat at the head of the table near his sister and brother-in-law).

Jareth came in from the kitchen door (oddly, considering he had just been with Sarah at the hallway door...), and slipped into his chair. The family quieted, looking toward him expectantly. Jareth turned to Sarah, nodding for her to address the family.

"Dad, would you say grace? Then we'll have the staff bring the food in." The family collectively bowed their heads, Jareth raised an eyebrow at Sarah, but followed suit.

Robert's prayer was short, sweet, and to the point: "Rubba, dub, dub, thanks for the grub, Yea God, let's eat."

No one said that the staunchly Catholic family had to be pious during every prayer.

Several of the taller goblins brought in trays, almost too fast to track. Trays piled high of ham and roast beef, bread and cheese, and vegetables were all but tossed in the center of the table. Sarah, however, got a special plate. A mammoth plate of pancakes and a hotdog, small honeycomb on the side.

Jareth leaned towards her and said in a low voice, "I had them make a special plate. Don't forget to add flax." He nudged a bowl of flax seeds toward her, watching as she bit into her hot dog with joy. He smiled and grabbed a roll and forked some roast beef.

The family dug in and for a few moments there was relative silence.

"So, Charlie, are you and Bobby ready to tie the knot in Connecticut this year? I saw that there's a sale on tuxedos down at the mall." Harriet Prell, Karen's mother and Charlie's grandmother spoke up for the first time.

"Uh, Grandma, we're not sure..." The Prell family wasn't known for their tact or social table conversation. Charlie flushed bright red and Bobby rolled his eyes.

"Grandma Prell, we're still talking about it. How are things at the casino for you and Grandpa Prell? Hit any big ones?" Bobby brought his own level of tact. It was Harriet's turn to flush, making it clear that casinos were not her choice of topic.

"All right, all right, let's call a truce right now, before we start a food fight." Aunt Hilde, often the quiet one, called out, banging her hand on the table.

"Food fight?" Bill and Jill, the twins, asked in unison, suddenly excited and ready to be a part of the conversation.

"Forget it." Mark, their father, said in a stern voice, glaring at his children.

"Why not? A good food fight is a great way to relieve stress." Jareth said casually as he picked up a handful of mashed potatoes and flicked them down the table at Emma. Emma sat in shock, then a slow, mischievous smile spread across her face.

She picked up a handful of steamed vegetables and tossed them across the table at her father, Larry. He did not look amused. His wife, Julia, however, chortled and grabbed a gravy boat of au jus and splashed it at Aunt Margie, sitting to her left.

From there, the fight started in earnest. There were a couple party poopers, namely Mark and Mari, the twins parents, and Karen's parents, who pushed back from the table disapprovingly.

Sarah, usually the instigator of such events, also pushed back from the table. Truth be told, she was starving and no amount of flinging food could keep her from her wonderful plate of pancakes (the hot dog was long gone). She propped the plate on her belly and sat chewing and laughing at her ludicrous family.

For the most part, everyone adjourned to their rooms to clean up after the impromptu food fight. Sarah opted to watch Jareth magic himself clean in the kitchen while she sat at the kitchen island stool and ate a salad laden with walnuts. She was eating for three, you know.

"Now explain to me what this name board thing is, before we meet with the family again. I have a feeling that the aunts are in the craft room, making this board as we speak."

"It's tradition. Well, sort of tradition. Naming boards were used for the twins and Toby. Emma, Charlie, and I were exempt from its...reach. Basically, there is a target board, similar to pin the tail on the donkey. Both parents are turned about and pin a tail on the board – the closest name between the two tails is the name of the child."

"Wait, what is this 'pin the tail on the donkey' business? I refuse to have another ass in the living room. We have enough of them in your family."

"Jareth!" Sarah paused to punch her husband, frowning disapprovingly. He pulled a funny face and she sighed in exasperation. She explained the basic rules of the game, Jareth's face lighting with understanding.

"You mean 'peg the goblin with a tankard of ale'. We elect to not use paper and poster down here – we use a real tankard of ale and a real goblin. So much more amusing." He nodded sagely.

"Oh, Jareth, you're impossible!" Sarah shook her head, laughing.

Jareth came to stand between her legs, leaning in close for a kiss. When his lips were but centimeters from hers, he whispered, "Oh, but you love me, wife."

"Of course I do." Sarah whispered back, her hand going to the back of his head, softly stroking his silky blonde hair.

_Two hours later_

The family, well most of the family, reconvened in one of the larger sitting rooms. The twins and their parents were absent, as were Karen's parents.

The aunts stood proudly in front of a bright and colorful poster board. It had been attached to a wall by a goblin and it had to be at least five feet in width, three feet high. There were numerous streaks of color, randomly drawn trees and flowers, and a footprint that looked suspiciously goblin-esque. Grouped in three different sections of the board were three blank geometric shapes – presumably spaces for the potential names.

"All right, let the game begin! First we'll come up with the potential names. Jareth, Sarah, do you have names in mind?" Aunt Gaby took control, the rest of the family situated themselves on the couches and pillows on the floor; the aunts all brandished colored pens to write in the proffered names.

"Since we don't know if we will have three boys, three girls, one boy, two girls, or one girl and two boys, we picked out a few names." Sarah beamed at her aunts, now full of food and quite content with her mindful husband.

"Why are we even doing this? I refuse to accept any of the names they fabricate." Jareth muttered under his breath. Sarah ignored his comment, but clasped his hand and intertwined their fingers.

"We were thinking Liam, Lorcan, and/or Lyra." Sara squeezed Jareth hand at the memory of when they had picked out the names.

_It had been a brisk fall afternoon, they had been sitting in the stone garden, in the second layer of the Labyrinth. Sarah had lain down on a bench, her head in Jareth's lap, one of his hands smoothing her hair from her face. She had nearly fallen asleep when Jareth spoke._

"_What do you think our little ones want to be called?" He said softly, a hand now lightly resting on Sarah's belly, his other hand still stroking her hair. _

"_It's hard to tell, Jareth – we don't even know what we're having at this point." Sarah peered up at Jareth's face. His eyes were closed, his head tilted toward the fading sunlight. He had a pensive look on his face, as if he were concentrating on an important task._

"_We're going to have two boys and a girl, Sarah, I can feel their energies." He was whispering now, trying to maintain the fragile connection to his unborn children. "One will be called Lorcan, because he will be fierce and strong. One will be Liam, as he will protect and lead our kingdom to new directions. And our baby girl will be Lyra, because she will be beautiful and unique. She will excel at the unexpected, I think."_

_Tears filled Sarah's eyes, her hand covering Jareth's. "Why must you make me weepy? Couldn't you just talk to the buggers when I'm asleep? You know, to give you some quality father/children time?"_

The awkward squawking of aunts not getting their way brought Sarah back to present day.

"I will NOT name a child of mine after a root. I refuse. DO NOT write that name down!" Jareth had passed the point of amusement, he was now shouting at the aunts as they stared dumbfounded in the face of his anger.

"But, Jareth, darling, Elettaria is such a wonderful name! Just think, there will be no other children with a name like hers!" Aunt Aggie piped up, clearly misunderstanding, somehow, the angry tone in Jareth's voice.

While Sarah had been wool gathering, there had been five names added to the board – the three that she had provided, Imogene, and Edward (Emma had suggested that name). Four more unlikely names had yet to be added.

Karen piped up, "What about Heinrich? That's a good, solid family name! I think there's one somewhere in the family."

"Oh, what about Mikhaela? I knew a Mikhaela once – she was a really awesome babysitter." Toby piped up, obviously getting into the game once he saw Jareth's controlled irritation.

"John."

"Ishmael."

"Paul."

"Ayn."

"George."

"Robin."

"Peter."

"Ringo." That was Uncle Larry, Karen's brother, just a laugh a minute.

Random names were called out at a rapid pace, the aunts recording the first two and stopping to chortle at the enthusiasm.

The board was primed and ready to go, the family began to clap and shout Mexican cries of joy (you know, the ai-ya-ya-ya-yah! goodness that is a Mexican fiesta...sadly, no chimichangas were present).

Sarah and Jareth were blindfolded, Jareth crossing his arms, refusing to cooperate. Fortunately, Aunt Sally could have been a linebacker and forcibly turned him about before the board. Sarah was also disoriented, albeit gently to avoid sudden onset nausea. They were both given their first markers and advanced to the board.

"Lyra!"

The couple was again put through the process, quickly pinning their markers.

"Lorcan!"

Jareth managed to nudge Sarah and whisper "This is almost too easy. Are you going to make it?" She had a slight green pallor, but that could have been the glare from the poster colors. She nodded and regripped the final marker.

"Ishmael!"

"What?"


	10. Ishmael!

"What?" Jareth exploded, tearing his blindfold off his face. Before he could examine the final marker placement, Sarah interrupted his forward march.

"I think I'm going to be sick." She pulled the blindfold off and covered her mouth as she not-so-gracefully gagged. Jareth gently picked her up and strode toward the door.

"We'll be back." He tossed over his shoulder, just barely managing to avoid the _Terminator_ impression. How he did enjoy those Arnold Schwarzenegger films...he had a complete collection in his man cave.

Sarah lay on their bed, her knees drawn up, Jareth rubbing her back rhythmically. The tossed cookies bin was on the floor next to Sarah but had yet to be used.

"I'm feeling better, Jareth. It was all that turning about nonsense. I'll have to have the aunts modify the game for the next unlucky Prell." Sarah took a deep breath and eased into sitting position.

"They're leaving after dinner tomorrow." Jareth flopped back against the pillows, one hand behind his head as he stared at the ceiling.

"Who is?" Sarah had made it to standing position and was moving toward the ensuite bathroom at a snails pace.

"Your family. Toby may stay. And Emma and her friend." Jareth closed his eyes, his order decreed.

He didn't see the flying cushion until it was too late. Sarah had snatched a pillow in passing of the chaise and magicked it to Jareth.

"Like hell. They're staying until next week, you've already agreed." She closed the bathroom door with a firm 'click', the conversation over.

Until, of course, Jareth, flung the door open and entered the small room. "They've upset you. They argue. They're loud. I will not have such chaos in my house!"

"Oh, but, Jareth, you are the Goblin King – surely you can manage a few rowdy humans? Besides, you started the food fight." Sarah was now accustomed, in the short months of their marriage, to Jareth joining her in the bathroom. Accustomed, yes, accepting, no.

Sarah stood before the sink, Jareth standing behind her, watching her in the mirror. Somehow in the process of squeezing toothpaste on her toothbrush a squirt hit Jareth's well developed chest...a chest that had somehow misplaced its shirt. Odd, that.

Sarah's eyes flew the Jareth's in surprise and she squawked. "Geez, Jareth! Put on a shirt!"

"Oh, but I rather like seeing you flustered. And I knew you would somehow manage to get a bathroom product on my person. I'm a planner, you know." He grinned mischievously and wiped his chest with a towel. Sarah's eyes followed the motion.

"Smug jerk." Sarah mumbled through the toothpaste foam.

"Now, to be serious, what shall we tell your aunts about Ishmael? I will not acquiesce on our children's names and your aunts can be rather...sensitive. If they are staying for another six days, then I'd rather have them sober and content than drunk and disorderly."

Sarah had a thoughtful look on her face and she continued to brush her teeth. Then she shrugged. "I dunno."

"Oh, really, Sarah, you have to have a better answer than that."

"Nope."

"Fine. I shall get them sauced and talk them into giving Liam his name back." Jareth provoked his wife, knowing that mention of her bottle-happy aunts being coerced while under the influence irritated her.

Sarah spit, rinsed, and hung up her toothbrush. "You do that, then. I rather like Ishmael."

"Sarah Kavanaugh? How can you say such a thing?" Jareth gasped, clearly shocked at his wife's statement. She just smiled, reached up and patted his cheek.

"You're so easy, darling." She paused. "In more ways than one." She smirked and wrapped her arms around her husband's shoulders.

Jareth sighed. "You're incorrigible. But you taste all minty." He leaned in for a kiss.

Thirty minutes later

"We should probably go check on your family. To make sure that they're not injuring each other or the furniture." Jareth spoke quietly, completely relaxed in their bed, Sarah snuggled into his side.

"'mmkay." Sarah mumbled, her eyes still closed.

Next thing she knew, they were both clothed and standing in front of the family room doors. It was a shock to be prone one moment and upright the next, not to speak of the unclothed/clothed change.

Her disorientation quickly dissipated when she heard sounds of boisterous laughter.

"What in the world is going on..." Sarah breathed and Jareth pushed open the doors to chaos.

There seemed to be some sort of keep away game going on, the aunts at the center of the disorder, shouting encouragement and prodding players along. Charlie and Bobby were standing off to the side, laughing at their relatives; the children were tossing some sort of soccer ball that had an odd shape to it. The other adults were grouped around the fire, sipping what looked like sherry, and talking among themselves, ignoring the keep away game.

The ball looked suspiciously like Blarm, one of the smaller goblins of the Castle. He had a fancy to twist up into a ball and bounce off things for fun, but it couldn't be him. Not playing a keep away game in front of the relatives, for which he should know it would be forbidden and punishable by bogging.

Jareth stepped in to the middle of the game, catching the ball, pulling a disbelieving look as he examined it, and tossed the ball in the air, at which it disappeared like a puff of smoke.

"Now, what say you all to an early night? We will have a long day tomorrow, what with the holiday and all." Jareth asked, with a pointed smile, wanting to end this day as soon as possible.

"We haven't finished the game, Jareth dearie!" Aunt Gaby exclaimed, realizing that both Sarah and Jareth had come in to the room.

"The game, Aunt Gaby?" Sarah asked, clearly confused – the game had ended when the ball had be taken.

"Why, yes, the naming board. We haven't confirmed the third baby's name!" Aunt Gaby pointed toward the board.

"We were just kidding you, of course, with Ishmael, Jareth. We knew that you would have a conniption! Though you left before we could see you throw a fit!" Aunt Sally piped up, grinning from ear to ear at the joke they had played.

"Oh, very funny. Just a joke, tra la la." Jareth muttered under his breath, turning to glare at his wife, blaming her for her family's stupid jokes. She smiled back at him, used their shenanigans by now.

"And what, according to the name board, is our second son to be called?"

"Why, Liam, of course!" Emma piped up from across the room.

"Of course, I told you all, but no one ever listens to me." Jareth said, loud enough for the room to hear.


	11. Keeping it in the family

The family had settled down to play respectable family games, such as cards and backgammon, at various tables around the room. The aunts elected to sit around the fire with Sarah and sip their tea.

"So what are Jareth's parents like? You have met them, haven't you dear?" Aunt Maggie piped up, smiling at Sarah as she took a ladylike sip of her tea.

Sarah's gaze sought Jareth's, hoping to skewer him with a stink eye, but he was fully involved in some sort of card/toy/ball game with Toby (Bakugan?).

"No, I haven't met them. We've been rather...isolated...the past few months. Now it's hard to get out, you know, with the weather and all. I think they were supposed to come this week, but I'm not sure now." Sarah nursed her ginger ale, waiting for the next question because she had recognized this sit down for what it was – an inquisition to rival the Spaniards'.

"Oh, well, that's not a good sign! You've been married for months now, and they didn't even come to the wedding! Maybe you should push Jareth a little into meeting his family and get a firm vacation date. Especially now with the little ones coming, you'll want more support." Aunt Gaby voiced her opinion, supported by the nods of her sisters.

It was interesting to note that Karen had not shared details of conversations she and Sarah had had over the past few months. Not that Sarah had been expecting a tell-all book written about it, but she had assumed that some things might have slipped out. There had been several long conversations via Skype about Sarah and Jareth's relationship, a few bits of useful advice had been shared, but those talks had turned into bonding sessions with stepmother and stepdaughter.

"Speaking of middle of nowhere...how are we going to get out for Black Friday? I'm sure that the stores will be open, as long as we can get to them! The vehicles we came in were nice and roomy, I'm sure we can make a family outing of it, for sure." Aunt Sally, a consummate shopper, inquired, her teacup rattling a little in its saucer as she squirmed with excitement (which, to be noted, was a little awkward. Aunt Sally is not a small woman, her squirming borders on indecency).

"Um, let me check with Jareth. I'm not sure that the driveway will even be clear, much less the roads for driving. We don't even have a paper for everyone to check out the sales – where would we go?" Sarah knew that this could lead to disaster, if the aunts pressed hard enough.

"We MUST go to Williams Sonoma, no question about it! They have fabulous sales and oh how I love love love their pancake mix!" Aunt Hilde added her two cents.

"Lord." Sarah sighed. "Let me ask Jareth tonight, I'll get back to you, all right? Now, how about that blog you were going to start, Aunt Gaby? How's that going?"

Across the room, Jareth heard the conversation and rolled his eyes. He and Sarah had talked about his family many times, but he had asked them to not come this week, as there would be an overwhelming number of people and his father wasn't known for his likeability.

"I gotcha!" Toby shouted, jerking Jareth's attention back to the game.

Jareth sighed, propped his chin on his hand and dived back in to the next round.

The rest of the evening passed uneventfully, besides the one occurrence of a sweater catching on fire (which may or may not have been an alcohol-related event). The family adjourned to bed early, with promises of a hearty breakfast and outdoor games, weather permitting.

Jareth and Sarah had retreated to their suite, Jareth sitting at the little secretary, doing some sort of paperwork, while Sarah watched a Dr Who episode on Netflix with the laptop on their bed.*

Sarah sighed and stretched, deciding that now was a better time than ever to ask Jareth about his family.

"Jareth?" Sarah asked quietly, peeping over the top of the laptop. She had managed to get über comfortable, half-propped on the headboard and the laptop resting on a pillow on her stomach. No point for moving from her comfortable spot if there were to be an uncomfortable conversation.

"Mm hmm?" He mumbled as he continued to scribble on some papers.

"Why did you tell your parents to not come this week?" Sarah asked from behind the protective shell of her computer.

"There are too many people here, they would add to the chaos." Jareth pulled open a drawer and grabbed a calculator (real men use calculators rather than make accounting mistakes).

"Oh." Sarah hunched back down over the laptop and pressed play on the show. She decided it wasn't worth it. She had her family and her brother and now she had Jareth. She didn't need more family, it would only add to the Christmas card list. Although it would be nice to have another set of grandparents to foist the children off on when she needed a break. And it would be nice to get to know the people who raised her husband, especially to get the dirt on his growing up years.

She had decided to give up on it, as Jareth was known to be a rather inflexible man, so there was no point to fight this battle – there were others pending that had more value (like the battle over keeping crunch or smooth peanut butter in the house. It'd scaled to almost a full waged war at this point, as Sarah's crunchy PB kept disappearing, but Jareth's smooth had no problem keeping on the shelf).

She had just gotten engrossed in the Dr Who episode when the laptop lid shut suddenly. Her eyes flew to those of her husband, he was now sitting on the side of the bed, his eyebrows knit together as he looked down at Sarah.

"Yes? I was just getting to a good part! The Doctor was fighting off the Cybermen!" Sarah made no attempt to sit up, assuming that Jareth would ask his question and leave her be.

"Why did you ask about my parents? Is this because of your conversation with the aunts?" He continued to stare intensely at Sarah, his hand keeping the laptop lid closed.

"No reason. Now leave me be, Jareth, the Doctor is in a pickle!"

"Tell me." Jareth demanded.

"Fine. I'm starting to think that you don't want them to meet me. For the sake of the Bog, we have hundreds of rowdy goblins running around this castle at any given time! What's two more? For a few days?"

"Father is rather crabby. He's not very likeable. I don't want him to get in an altercation with your cousin or Karen's parents – which would be inevitable." Jareth sighed, glad to finally know the reason for Sarah's questioning. He rolled to his side to lie next to Sarah, enabling her to open the laptop.

"Oh, who cares, broken bones can mend. I'm sure that Cousin Mark could take him." She pressed play, trying to play off the family visit nonchalantly.

"Fine. I'll invite them again. They may not make it until this weekend, though, as they are busy people. Now, turn up the volume, I can't hear it."

*the author of said fanfic does not necessarily promote the product featured herein. However, Dr Who is a very educational show and Netflix streaming can beat the pants off of illegal downloading with a big, red stick of justice.


	12. Thanksgiving, a Play in Four Acts

AN: So, so sorry for the delay. Life sort of happened, but I'm getting back into the groove.

AN2: I've replaced the previous chapter's tangential cast of characters with a moving-the-story-along chapter. Hopefully it's not too jarring.

AN3: I don't own the familiar cast of characters.

Chapter 12: Thanksgiving, A Play in Four Acts | Act I

The bedroom door flew open, a small acrobatic body vaulted into Jareth and Sarah's bed.

"Wake up! It's Thanksgiving! There are things to do!" Toby's high-pitched ten-year old voice rang out, managing to shake the window curtains as he proceeded to tumble, jump, and flip in the gigantic bed.

"He's your brother. You deal with him". Jareth, lying face down, reached out an arm to find his wife, fully intending to have her deal with the child while he got his beauty rest. His hand found nothing but cold rumpled sheets and his now vulnerable hand was quickly pounced on.

"Come on, Jareth! Everyone has been up for _hours_! We need you to play football outside. Sarah sent me up to wake you up." Toby was tugging insistently at Jareth's hand.

Jareth, knowing just how to deal with this early morning interruption, extricates his hand and proceeds to give the boy a shove, followed by a very satisfying thump on the bedside rug.

"Now, Sarah dear, where is your television? We want to watch the parade on cable." Karen's aunt Hilde leaned forward, resting her elbows on the breakfast table.

"Just back through the parlor, Aunt Hilde". Sarah said distractedly as she slathered marmalade on toast with one hand, a cup of tea halfway to her lips with the other. "Oh, and take the other aunts with you. I think Aunt Gaby's in the kitchen making banana bread."

"Sure thing, sweetie. We'll leave you in peace." Sarah gave a preoccupied nod as she took a bite of the toast, made a face, and tossed the slice down on a growing pile of discarded foods. Eating during pregnancy was turning into a trial and error freak show with the main goal of determining which foods didn't taste like bog water and wouldn't make a reappearance later. It was a slow process.

The dining room became quiet, as the five Aunts had wandered off to watch the Macy's Day parade; Toby, the twins, Emma, and Rachel were outside in the snow (of course 'supervised' by several goblins); the other adults (Sarah's parents, Karen's cousins, brother, and parents, as well as Robert's parents) were either in their rooms or in a distant parlor grumbling about family dysfunctions; and Charlie and Bobby had yet to make an appearance.

Sarah was just taking a healthy spoon of Count Chocula cereal when Jareth made his appearance.

"You are rather mercenary, my dear. Sending your little brother to do your dirty work. Tsk tsk." Jareth pulled out the chair to Sarah's left, plopped down and immediately grabbed for the closest pot of tea. He was wearing another fleece pullover and the rather comfy-looking jeans, but had only wool socks on his feet.

"Mm hmm, as if you wouldn't do the same to me. Except, as I imagine, there will be three small children rousing me from bed." Sarah took another large spoonful, thinking that this may be the best bowl of cereal in the history of cereal.

"Where's the family?" Jareth was now piling a plate with various breakfast meats and a large serving of scrambled eggs.

"Around here somewhere. The kids are outside - it looks like the weather has completely cleared and…'magically'…the five feet of snow is really only about a foot. I have a sneaking suspicion that several of the family members will leave today, if they can find flights. Probably Karen's cousins and her brother and his family." Sarah picked up the speed on consuming her breakfast, hoping to win the space battle of her stomach against three babies.

"We can certainly find them flights. By the power of the Labyrinth, it shall be done. How does 10AM sound?" Far off in the distance, a clock chimed.

"Yeah, seeing as how it's ten now…how about we wait until after Thanksgiving dinner. Say, 3PM or so?" Sarah took one last bite, pushed her bowl away, and sat back contentedly, rubbing lightly at her stomach.

"All right…if you're su-", Jareth's response was cut short by shrieks of laughter (and some horror tossed in) coming from down the hall.

Sarah and Jareth exchanged a look and, after Jareth assisted his wife out of her chair, sprang to the door, just in time to hear Aunt Gaby exclaim.

"I've only had a nip of whiskey in my tea this morning, but, by God, Margie, I'd swear you were on the ceiling!"


End file.
